Quran Study 07 Jan 1983 By Dr Rashad Khalifa
Transcript
0:00 Kathryn,
0:00 Dr. That's the new chapter of her life.
0:04 The child would make captives of the parents, say,
0:07 they are not allowed to be free.
0:11 Dr. Why?
0:12 Kathryn,
0:12 Dr. You can't say they are not allowed to be, always down the line.
0:15 I can see that.
0:16 Dr. There's no more down the line.
0:17 It really has to be done before the iddah is over.
0:21 You mean, right then you are being a user.
0:25 Dr. You know, so in the Quran, what's the limitation of the power of God?
0:28 Kathryn: Then I have a question for you.
0:35 Dr. There's a couple that's at war, and then the woman discovers that she's pregnant.
0:46 Dr. In that case, she tells her ex-husband, and he decides to tell her that he wants to reconcile with her.
0:54 Kathryn: The woman hates this guy. She doesn't want to go back to him.
1:00 Dr. So, that's what I was saying. In this case, she should give up her feelings and force herself to look in his eyes, for the sake of the child.
1:13 Dr. And God will make it up to her. That's what I'm saying.
1:17 Kathryn: No, I'm just exaggerating, sir.
1:20 Dr. You know what I'm saying?
1:22 Dr. You just want to understand?
1:26 Kathryn: Yes, in the case of divorce, the three times,
1:29 does that mean a verbal declaration of divorce in one sitting?
1:34 To have a divorce, to have a divorce, to have a divorce?
1:37 Dr. Does that mean that you can't marry the same woman after that divorce
1:40 after the third time?
1:44 Dr. The most important thing is she has to be re-married.
1:47 Kathryn: Why?
1:50 Dr. It's a verbal...
1:51 It's a verbal affliction.
1:54 A verbal affliction.
1:56 Kathryn: Are you in trouble?
1:57 Dr. I may be.
2:01 I may be.
2:02 I'm not aware of it.
2:04 I'm not aware of it.
2:07 Dr. I'm just kidding.
2:11 Dr. A verbal utterance in anger can send you to Hell.
2:15 Dr. If you utter it in anger, with fighting and arguing, it doesn't count. When you are angry and you say, "You are divorced,"
2:26 Dr. that's not divorce.
2:28 Dr. Because you have to come to a conclusion that your life together is not working, and really you must part, and so forth.
2:37 Dr. So, then you break apart, and the emotional bond is dead.
2:44 Dr. You live apart, that's divorce.
2:48 Dr. But in anger, people utter the divorce.
2:53 But it doesn't mean divorce.
2:54 No.
2:54 Kathryn: Why do you think that?
3:01 Dr. Why?
3:06 Dr. That requires reflection, and conviction.
3:16 No.
3:17 No.
3:23 No.
3:26 In 2:226, the waiting period, the cooling off period is 4 months before you make the final decision.
3:33 After the 4 months you can say go through with it, or you say no, I'm going to reconcile.
3:41 God loves those who reconcile.
3:47 From the time of separation, the idea is to clear the womb, to determine if there is pregnancy from the first husband before she marries a new husband.
3:59 The interim starts from the time of separation, physical separation.
4:05 There are three menstruations. The interim is three menstruations.
4:10 Then the woman is sure there is no pregnancy from the previous husband.
4:16 How much time?
4:17 The determining factor here is the moment of the birth of the child.
4:21 A widow has to wait 4 months and 10 days.
4:25 Widow?
4:26 Yes.
4:28 This is the official mourning period for a widow.
4:33 Mourning.
4:34 Mourning.
4:35 Mourning.
4:37 The minimum?
4:38 Mourning.
4:38 Mourning.
4:39 Sadness, a period of sadness, a minimum period of honouring the dead is not necessary.
4:50 Do you want to ask a question about the dowry?
4:52 Yeah, about the dowry, is there any minimum limit for the dowry or if the dowry is a million, you know, money or something?
5:01 It can be anything.
5:02 Anything of value.
5:03 Well, you see, that is when you get into slavery.
5:08 You see, a woman constantly tells her husband that
5:11 "you are my slave, I'll do what I like."
5:14 What are you doing?
5:16 Yeah, really?
5:19 Look at the two of them.
5:24 Look at the both of you.
5:33 I'm not sure what you want to say.
5:34 I don't know what you mean.
5:36 He doesn't know what you're saying.
5:40 The question.
5:42 (Silence)
5:51 Alright.
5:57 So...
5:57 The point is that this beautiful concept from God has been corrupted by our traditions into a transaction. People are now treating it as a price for a woman, which is totally against the Quranic ideal. For example...
6:33 The price of a wife in Libya now is 60,000 Dinars.
6:37 What?
6:38 It's a quote, man.
6:41 How do you know?
6:42 How do you know?
6:44 I have the figure.
6:45 It's from a news feature.
6:46 Oh my God.
6:48 Is that the going figure?
6:50 I have a question.
6:51 It's a good thing.
6:53 It's a good thing.
6:54 It's a good thing.
6:55 It's a good thing.
6:56 It's a good thing.
6:56 It's a good thing.
7:03 The dowry in Saudi Arabia is $100,000.
7:07 $100,000?
7:09 Yes.
7:09 In American money?
7:12 Yes.
7:13 And last month the king issued a...
7:18 That sounds very decent.
7:20 The king issued a decree to lower the dowry, of course.
7:24 Well, the Saudi men were going outside of Saudi Arabia to get married.
7:28 That's the matter.
7:29 Yeah.
7:32 You can see what happened after that.
7:35 I mean, it's a burden for the man.
7:37 You've got to pay if you want a wife.
7:41 That's right.
7:42 And as a matter of fact, they, uh,
7:49 sometimes they will say,
7:50 "Okay, you will have to pay $10,000 and sign a million-dollar note in case of divorce."
7:58 So, to force a husband or a wife to stay is a kind of slavery.
8:06 But there are a lot of circumstances surrounding it.
8:11 They call it a financial scenario.
8:14 But it has to be between the man and the woman who marry, right?
8:19 But over there, in Turkey, you don't really pay a ton of gold for everything there.
8:24 Yeah.
8:34 Okay, we have five more minutes for questions.
8:37 We're going to stop right here.
8:38 This whole side has been a very good one.
8:42 Generally, that's very easy.
8:46 Why did you say no to them?
9:21 I heard something about the divorce.
9:24 I heard something, in fact, that you repeat the divorce, you repeat it three times.
9:33 Yeah.
9:36 That's not the way to divorce.
9:38 That's one point.
9:42 You have to wait four months before the decision was made.
9:54 The idea is that a man and a woman are married, and the marriage doesn't work, so they go apart.
10:01 Then they reconcile, and they live together for a while, and then it doesn't work out, so they break apart.
10:09 Then they say, "Well, let's just try again," and they reconcile, and they're together for another year, and then they break apart.
10:17 So God is saying, "You guys are not good for each other, I want you to try somebody else."
10:21 So after the third time, she has to marry somebody else.
10:25 And of course, there are lots of movies about this in the Middle East, because,
10:30 it happens in real life and in movies that there is a couple that has had three divorces,
10:38 and now she has to marry somebody else, according to the Quranic law.
10:41 They say, okay, then go out in the streets and find some drunkard or something, and get him to marry you,
10:49 and then this will fulfill the requirement, so they go out in the streets and find the first
10:58 vagrant, some bum sitting on the sidewalk or something, they bring him in and they clean
11:04 him up, and he marries the divorcee, and of course they are guarding him all night.
11:16 Then the movies come in where this bum all of a sudden becomes very smart and says no, where is my wife?
11:25 And then all the problems arise from that.
11:29 And the movie goes on and on. But it doesn't happen in real life.
11:33 But, you know, this rule is for the woman. If the husband dies, the woman waits. But it's not the case that if the woman dies, the man has to wait four months and ten days. The Quran doesn't account for that.
11:55 No, no, no, this is about...
11:59 No, no, believe me, believe me.
12:01 You have to clear the womb.
12:04 You have to know who the father is.
12:09 I thought this was about the mourning.
12:21 The man doesn't have to, there's no incubation for the man, in fact the man can have other
12:27 wives on this planet.
12:42 I must go back and mention that those people who try to deceive, get around the Quranic laws, are only deceiving themselves.
12:52 You must follow God's commandments, and not try to get around them.
13:02 Okay, there are no more questions.
13:03 We're going to do it again.
13:04 Yeah, sure.
13:05 We're going to do it again.